Thank You!

There are numerous benefits to practicing mindfulness and gratitude, all of which alleviate the stress and anxiety of current life. Mindfulness can help stop the constant chatter in the mind, allowing people to take time to recognize and cope with their emotions. In the weeks leading up to Thanksgiving, November’s edition of Power Parent Magazine connected GRPS families with mindfulness and gratitude resources to help everyone cope with the stress of daily life.

Power Parent: November 2023 covers each of the following articles:

• Find a guide to kick off a month of gratitude in Gratitude Exercises & Activities
• Caregivers, did you know you can combat stress with mindfulness? Find more under Respond v. React
• Under Mindful Media for Kids, you’ll find a list of top-rated apps, games, and more for you child to use to be more mindful
• COVID is still upon us, but that doesn’t mean we can’t still be grateful! Discover more in COVID Thanksgiving
• In Practicing Mindful Gratitude, you’ll find resources to help your family practice mindfulness and gratitude
  
• A grateful family is a happy family. Find helpful resources under Thankful for Family

 

Three Key Factors to Mindful Parenting

1. Notice your own feelings when you’re in conflict with your child
Think about your most recent argument or a frustrating situation with your child. What feelings are triggered? Are you angry, ashamed, embarrassed? Try to experience your emotion or trigger as a wave – coming and going. Try not to block or stop the emotion. Don’t push it away. Don’t judge or reject it. Don’t try to keep the emotion around. Don’t cling to it. Don’t make it bigger than it already is. You are not your emotion and you don’t have to act on the emotion. Just be there, fully mindful of it. Remind yourself that you don’t need to blame yourself or your child for what happened.

Next, try to see the conflict through your child’s eyes. If you can’t see goodness in your child during a tantrum or argument, think of a time when you felt connected with your child and responded with kindness. Try to remember that version of your child when you are triggered.

As you go throughout your day, make an effort to notice when you start to feel anxious or annoyed. That may be a signal that you are being triggered. Once you figure out your triggers, you can move to the next step.

2. Learn to pause before responding in anger
The most challenging and most important part of mindfulness is being able to find that calm space in the heat of the moment. We practice finding this space by focusing our attention on our body and breath because emotions show themselves as changes in body or breath. When we slow down and focus on our body and breath, there is a physiological change that decreases our reflexive responses and increases the abilities of our prefrontal cortex.

All of this leads to a calmer mind where you can find the space to sit with the emotion. When we are able to pause, we can experience the emotions as sensations in our body without fueling them by focusing on the trigger. In that space, we can remind ourselves to breathe and bring our thoughts back to the present moment, and then choose to respond how we want to and not react because we are out of control.

3. Listen carefully to a child’s viewpoint even when disagreeing with it
Your child is going to act like a child! This means they won’t always be able to manage their feelings. Kids are still learning how to regulate (actually, so are most adults) and have different priorities than you do. Their behavior will push your button at times, and that is okay.

The problem is when adults begin acting like kids, too. If, instead, we can stay mindful – meaning we notice our emotions and let them pass without acting on them – we model emotional regulation, and our children learn from watching us.

Learning to pause before responding takes practice and our ability to control our emotions changes depending on what’s going on each day. That is why self-care is so important. We can’t pour out all of ourselves every day and never take the time to fill back up. Many parents feel guilty for taking care of their own needs. That is not selfish – it’s necessary. Make yourself a priority, because the better you feel, the better you will be able to manage the frustrations that arise.

It is important to learn how to help yourself and how to meet your emotional needs. Examples of self-care can range from things like taking a time-out by hiding in the bathroom when you can’t handle your kids (which I did last night), taking a few minutes of deep breathing, or putting the television so you and your kid get a break to writing in a journal, taking a shower, going for a walk, or talking to your partner or a friend.

And, sometimes, we can’t catch ourselves in time and we do react in ways we regret. In those moments, we can apologize to our kids after we yell at them because we are still learning and parents make mistakes, too.

Written by: Jill Ceder

 

GRATITUDE EXERCISES & ACTIVITIES

1. Journaling

Writing down a few things you are grateful for is one of the easiest and most popular exercises available.

The purpose of the exercise is to reflect on the past day, few days, or week, and remember 3-5 things you are especially grateful for. In this way, you are focusing on all the good things that happened to you in a given set of time.

What is the appropriate amount of journaling one should do per week? Some people propose doing it every day while others suggest once per week. The arguments against doing it every day are that it can be tedious and forced. It becomes a practice you feel you should do or need to do instead of something you want  to do. When journaling becomes a banal task and not an enjoyable practice then you need to adjust the amount of journaling you do.

Besides the benefit of focusing on the wonderful things, this practice actually can increase your quality of sleep, decrease symptoms of sickness, and increase joy (Marsh, 2011).

It is important to cater your practice to what you need. Perhaps journaling every day for a short amount of time works for you, but over time, it feels better to journal every Friday.

Paying attention to what you are grateful for becomes easier as you practice it.

Imagine your life without the things or people that matter to you, before you begin writing. That should definitely boost your gratitude barometer.

2. Gratitude Jar

The gratitude jar is a stunningly simple exercise that can have profound effects on your well-being and outlook. It only requires a few ingredients: a jar (a box can also work); a ribbon, stickers, glitter, or whatever else you like to decorate the jar; paper and a pen or pencil for writing your gratitude notes; and gratitude!

Step 1: Find a jar or box.

Step 2: Decorate the jar however you wish. You can tie a ribbon around the jar’s neck, put stickers on the sides, use clear glue and glitter to make it sparkle, paint it, keep it simple, or do whatever else you can think of to make it a pleasing sight.

Step 3: This is the most important step, which will be repeated every day. Think of at least three things throughout your day that you are grateful for. It can be something as benign as a coffee at your favorite place, or as grand as the love of your significant other or dear friend. Do this every day, write down what you are grateful for on little slips of paper and fill the jar.

Over time, you will find that you have a jar full of a myriad of reasons to be thankful for what you have and enjoy the life you are living. It also will cultivate a practice of expressing thanks.

If you are ever feeling especially down and need a quick pick-me-up, take a few notes out of the jar to remind yourself of who, and what, is good in your life.

3. Gratitude Rock

This exercise may sound a little silly. You may be thinking, “A rock? How can a rock help me practice gratitude?”

The secret to this exercise is that the rock is a symbol, a physical object you can use, to remind yourself of what you have.

The instructions are about as simple as instructions can be: just find a rock!

Make sure to pick one you like, whether you like it because it’s pretty because it is smooth or has an interesting texture, or because you picked it up from a special place. If you have another small object you’d rather use instead, feel free to substitute that for the rock.

Carry this rock around in your pocket, leave it on your desk where you will see it throughout your day, or even wear it on a chain around your neck or your wrist.

Whenever you see it or touch it, pause to think about at least one thing you are grateful for. Whether it’s something as small as the sun shining down on you in this moment or as large as the job that allows you to feed yourself or your family, just think of one thing that brings you joy or fulfillment.

When you take the stone out of your pocket or off of your body at the end of the day, take a moment to remember the things that you were grateful for throughout the day. When you put it on or in your pocket again in the morning, repeat this process to remember what you were grateful for yesterday.

Not only will this help you remember the things you are grateful for, but also it can trigger a mini-mindfulness moment in your day. It will bring you out of your head and into the present moment, giving you something to focus your attention on. It can also act as a switch to more positive thinking.

When you flip this switch multiple times a day, you will likely find that your average day has become much more positive.

4. Gratitude Tree

The gratitude tree is a great activity for children, and it can also be effective for adults who are open to experiencing a childlike sense of fun and wonder. You will need several double-sided colored sheets of paper, string or ribbon, scissors, twigs or tree branches, some stones or marbles, a vase, and a sense of gratitude.

• Step 1: Make one or more leaf cutouts to use as a template for your leaves.
• Step 2: Cut out the leaves, punch a hole at the top of each leaf, and loop your string or ribbon through each hole.
• Step 3: Put the stones or marbles in a vase and stick the tree branch or twig in the middle.
• Step 4: Have your (or your child) draw or write things that you (or your child) are grateful for on the leaves. You can also use photographs if you’d like.
• Step 5: Hang the leaves from the branches, and behold your gratitude tree!

This activity is easy and results in a pretty reminder of the things that bring you or your child joy throughout your daily life. It may be intended for kids but there is no age limit on finding creative ways to cultivate your gratitude, so get to drawing!

The gratitude garden activity is a good activity to follow creating gratitude trees. This is also intended for children, but adults can certainly follow along to get into the gratitude spirit.

Follow these steps to journey to the gratitude garden.

1. Start the Journey: Stand up in front of the group, with the Thankfulness/Gratitude Tree in clear view. Explain that you are all going on a trip to the Grateful Garden, but to get there you have to go through three dangerous places. (Insert a word other than “dangerous” if more appropriate to the age group). The Thankfulness Tree will help you get through each one so you can make it to the Grateful Garden.
2. The Frowny Forest: The first stop is the Frowny Forest. Have the kids all mimic you as you frown, cross your arms, and hunch over. There is a lot of wind in the Frowny Forest, so mimic being tossed about by the wind, turning back and forth as if you are trying to fight it. The only way to leave the Frowny Forest is to feel happy again, so ask the kids to shout out things they are grateful for (using the Thankfulness Tree as a prompt). After they have named a few things, mimic great relief, with a big smile.
3. The Sad Swamp: But, oh no! Just beyond the Frowny Forest is the Sad Swamp! Hunch over again, swing your arms down low, and walk (in place) in big, heavy steps, as if walking through mud or water. Again, have the kids shout out things they are grateful for, so you can all leave the Sad Swamp.
4. The Mad Mountain: Past the Sad Swamp is the Mad Mountain. Have them imitate you as you pretend to climb up the mountain with great effort, making angry faces. Again, have the kids shout out things they are grateful for, so you can all feel happy again.
5. The Grateful Garden: Finally, you have all arrived at the Grateful Garden! What a good job they have done! To celebrate, everyone can do a Happy Hop! (All Done Monkey, 2012)

Going through each of these negative emotions can be a fun and interactive learning opportunity for kids. For older children (or young-minded adults!), you can even add in a few other, more complex negative emotions, like the “Disgusted Dock” or the “Petty Pier.”

To read these instructions, click here.

Meditation Apps For Kids That Will Help Them Process Emotions and Stay Calm

This is an uncertain time filled with stressful moments, anxiety, and the pressure to constantly “do something” with our kids, who have likely all lost any semblance of normal routines. Although meditation is something that both adults and kids can benefit from practicing at any time, now more than ever, being able to process feelings, destress, and get quality sleep is of the utmost importance.

While we all have our families under one roof, cohabiting in a way that’s different than ever before, turn to one of the below apps for kids that contain mindfulness activities, guided meditations, and more to help them process their feelings, stay calm under stress and pressure, and get to sleep a little easier each night.

GoNoodle

All GoNoodle videos are created by a team of experienced designers, educators, and child development, movement and dance specialists. When your child is playing GoNoodle, you can feel confident that she’s in a safe, secure environment; we have no in-app purchases or links to other sites. And with everything from dance and yoga, to hip-hop and sports, GoNoodle has videos that appeal to kids of different ages and their varying interests. Every dance party, yoga video or breathing exercise is an opportunity for kids to wake up their bodies, engage their minds, and have a blast.

Moshi: Sleep and Mindfulness

The Moshi: Sleep and Mindfulness app has soothing bedtime stories for kids to help calm them down before bed and, hopefully, lull them to sleep. The app is free and has some free content, including “Close Your Eyes Sleepy Paws” and “Goldie the Mindful Moshling” (which is narrated by Goldie Hawn).

Breathe, Think, Do with Sesame

A free app aimed at kids ages 4 and up, Breathe, Think, Do With Sesame helps to teach kids skills such as problem solving, self-control, planning, and task persistence through its interactive activities. Your kids can also “Breathe With the Monster” to practice taking deep breaths when they need to calm down. Click here to read Common Sense Media’s review of this app!

Smiling Mind

Smiling Mind is a free meditation app for people of all ages, but has youth programs for kids ages 7 and up. The app was developed by psychologists and educators to aid users in keeping their minds healthy through times of stress, pressure, and the challenges of daily life. Click here to read Common Sense Media’s review of this app!

Mindful Powers

The fun and easy-to-use Mindful Powers app was designed to be a part of your child’s daily routine to help them to learn the power of mindfulness through a series of interactive voice-guided sessions. The free app will help kids develop the skills they need to overcome big emotions, stay calm and relaxed, and to focus. Click here to read Common Sense Media’s review of this app!

Stop, Breathe, and Think Kids

With the Stop, Breathe & Think Kids app, kids ages 5 through 10 can learn to check in with how they’re feeling, listen to mindful sleep stories before bed, go on “missions” to do meditation and mindful activities, and more. The app can help them manage stress, anxiety, and sadness, and aids with both better sleep and calming down when overexcited. Click here to read Common Sense Media’s review of this app!

Wellbeyond Meditation for Kids

Aimed at kids ages 4 and up, Wellbeyond Meditation For Kids offers five free guided meditations to help with sleep, relaxation, focus, concentration, managing feelings, and more. There are nine additional meditations available as in-app purchases. Click here to read Common Sense Media’s review of this app!

What is Mindfulness?

Mindfulness is the practice of paying attention to the present moment and accepting what you are sensing and feeling without interpretation or judgment.  Mindfulness involves breathing methods, guided imagery, and other techniques to relax the body and mind and reduce stress.

Mindfulness has benefits for kids too. Mindfulness helps kids focus, reduce anxiety, and regulate their emotions. It has even been shown to reduce aggression, which improves social relationships.

Let’s get started! We’ve assembled a collection of resources so you can learn more about mindfulness and find the methods and techniques that work best for you.

Plan a 30 Day Gratitude Challenge with Your Family

There are tons of articles online with gratitude challenges that families can participate in together, but we think that the best way for families like yours to put a plan into practice is to make the plan together. We recommend making a gratitude-themed calendar with a different activity your family can do together every day that inspires gratefulness.

PHOTO CHALLENGE

Each member of the family will each take a gratitude picture every day and share it. (A positive use for social media!) Whether it’s a photo of the new puppy in the family or a pretty sunrise, knowing that you’ll find one thing every day that makes you grateful can change your focus on the whole season.

MAKE GRATITUDE STONES

This is a cute and easy craft for all ages.  Gratitude stones can be used as conversation starters, to calm down strong feelings, or as part of a bedtime ritual.  They are also fun to share with others! (From Fireflies and Mudpies)

THEMED CONVERSATION PROMPTS

Dedicate one or two nights per week to gathering for a family dinner. Then, plan to discuss one of the following themes around the table (from Positively Present):

GROWTH

Whether you realize it or not, every day, every moment, you’re growing and changing. Most of us focus on growth as something that happens when we’re young, but we never stop growing. How have you grown over the past year? Or how have you seen someone or something else grow?

KNOWLEDGE

You’ve learned so much since the day you were born, which is pretty amazing. What’s the thing you’re most thankful to have learned? Is there knowledge you’ve gathered this year that you’re particularly grateful for? Also, today is a great day to be thankful for the resources and people who have taught you.

MUSIC

What song are you most thankful for right now?

NATURE

No matter where you live, there’s likely to be some nature around you. What is inspiring or beautiful about nature you come into contact with often? What elements of nature do you most connect with? What element of the natural world are you most grateful to experience?

MEMORY

Consider your favorite moment or item from the past. What was wonderful about it? How do you feel when you think of that time / thing / person?

CHANGE

Change can be a negative or positive experience, but it’s an inevitable part of life. What’s changed in life over the past year? What’s changed in the last decade? Do you have new friends, new experiences, new mindsets? If you’re struggling with this prompt, change the way you do something today and see how it feels.

PEACE

When do you most feel at peace? When you do feel relaxed, calm, and most like yourself? Those moments are the ones you should celebrate today (and maybe even consider how you want to incorporate more of them in your life!).

BEAUTY

There is always something beautiful around you if you make an effort to look for it. What beauty are you grateful to see or experience today, right now? What things make your home, office, neighborhood, etc. more beautiful? Who around you embodies the essence of beauty? What do you find beautiful about yourself?

COLOR

How do you feel about color? Which ones are your favorites? What colors inspire feelings of happiness? Share those today!

FRIENDSHIP

Without friendship, life would be quite dull. Today’s the day to focus your attention on the friends who brighten your world. Who has been by your side no matter what? Who can you call, day or night, for a chat? Who puts a smile on your face when you think of them?

BOOKS

What books do you love most? What’s the best book you’ve read this year, or in recent years? What have you learned from books that you might not have otherwise known?

KINDNESS

Kindness is such a simple thing, but it’s not always as abundant as it could be. Today’s a good day to do something especially kind for someone else. It’s also the day to celebrate kindness — kindness you’ve committed, you’ve experienced, or you’ve witnessed. When you think of the word “kindness,” what’s the first thing you think of?

HOME

What does the word “home” mean to you? Is it where you rest your head each night? Is it where you grew up? Or is home more of a state of mind? Or perhaps a person? Home doesn’t need to be a physical thing so feel free to explore creatively with this prompt. Whatever home means to you, reflect on it and share a photo of it today.

HUMOR

Humor is one of life’s greatest gifts. It can transform a mood, lighten a tough time, or touch on tough topics with levity. Today, reflect on what makes you laugh and the things you find humorous. Is it a movie? A book? A joke? A memory? A friend? Whatever evokes that giddy sense of joy within you, be thankful for it.

FAMILY

Family — no matter what shape or size it comes in  — is something we’re all lucky to have in our lives. Take note of your family today (and “family” can include friends or anyone you’ve chosen as your family, too!). What do you love about the family you surround yourself with? What do you often take for granted and could be extra appreciative of today?

SELF

No matter what, the one thing you will always have in your life is YOU. On the final day of the challenge, I like to turn our attention inward. Consider, today, all the ways you are amazing, and appreciate the good (and not so good!) parts of yourself. What do you love most about you? What aspects do you feel deserve more love and attention?

• WATCH GRATITUDE VIDEOS ON YOUTUBE: There are so many great videos you can enjoy as a family, then follow with a group discussion! Here is one example:

MAKE THANK-YOU LETTERS OR DRAWINGS

Most people love receiving thank you cards: family members, friends, your child’s teachers, neighbors, etc. This can also be a great way to teach your child how to address a friendly letter and send it via “snail mail!”

 

To read more about gratitude in November 2023’s edition of Power Parent Magazine, please follow this link.